Couples Counselling
Couples Counselling at Mind and Soul Counselling
Strengthening Relationships with Evidence-Based Care
At Mind and Soul Counselling , we use a range of evidence-informed approaches to support and strengthen relationships. One of the key modalities we draw upon is the Gottman Method Couples Therapy (Level 1 & 2 trained).
What is the Gottman Method?
The Gottman Method is a research-based approach to couples therapy developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman. It combines assessment tools and targeted therapeutic interventions grounded in decades of relationship research, guided by the Sound Relationship House Theory.
Research by the Gottmans has identified four behaviors that are strong predictors of relationship breakdown:
- Criticism – attacking your partner’s character
- Defensiveness – avoiding responsibility by shifting blame
- Stonewalling – emotionally withdrawing and shutting down
- Contempt – conveying superiority through sarcasm, mockery, or eye-rolling
In contrast, couples who maintain lasting, meaningful relationships demonstrate mutual respect, emotional responsiveness, and healthy communication patterns.
What to Expect in Gottman Method Therapy
Couples beginning Gottman Method therapy go through a comprehensive assessment process, which informs the goals and structure of therapy:
Assessment Phase
Includes a joint session, individual interviews, and completion of relationship questionnaires. This provides insight into the strengths and challenges in your relationship.
Therapeutic Planning
Based on the assessment, you and your therapist will determine the focus, frequency, and duration of sessions.
Intervention Phase
Sessions focus on enhancing three core areas: friendship, conflict management, and shared meaning. You will learn to replace unhelpful patterns with healthy, respectful interactions and develop tools to rebuild trust and connection.
Seven Principles for Making Relationships Work
The Gottman framework is supported by seven key principles:
- Build Love Maps - Deepen knowledge of each other’s worlds.
- Express Fondness and Admiration – Cultivate appreciation and respect.
- Turn Toward Each Other – Respond to bids for connection.
- Accept Influence – Share power and decision-making.
- Solve Solvable Problems – Develop constructive conflict resolution skills.
- Manage Conflict and Overcome Gridlock – Navigate differences effectively.
- Create Shared Meaning – Build rituals, goals, and values together.
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